Dream Job

Dear Sir/Madam:

I respectfully submit my name for the position of “reader” as advertised in Big Butt’s Weekly. I learned to read at the age of 4, with Whistle for Willie by Ezra Jack Keats being the first book I read all by myself. But even before that, I was steeped in literature as my parents read aloud to me every night.

Since first learning to read, I have never stopped. I have even known to read cereal boxes or ketchup bottles when nothing else is available. I even majored in English Literature in college, because really, what else would a reader major in?

Please be advised, I do not want to read boring articles or books. I have standards, you know, and stick by them rigorously, with only the minor slip of a Nora Roberts here and there. I am open to any and all genres, except horror (or blood & guts stuff) – anything that will give me nightmares, because the only thing more important to me than reading is sleeping. However, I will not waste time on anything that does not catch my interest within the first 100 pages. If I am still questioning why I’m reading the book at that point, I will not finish it.

Above all, please know that I am a professional, and I take my job very seriously, as the size of my butt will attest.

Thank you for your time and I look forward to hopefully reading my acceptance letter from you shortly.

Sincerely,
marybeth494
The Couch, Living Room

This post is part of the Monday Mission to write a resume (see how well I follow directions? Don’t you want to hire me immediately?) hosted by the ever lovely Painted Maypole. Check out her blog to see who else is participating.
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4 Responses to “Dream Job”

  1. kaye Says:

    delightful!

    I'd hire you for the job based on that resume.

  2. Mary G Says:

    I love it! Only problem is, I want to steal it and apply for the same job.

  3. painted maypole Says:

    ha ha! nice! i was thinking that a cover letter would be a good mission, and look, you just adapted and did one all on your own!

  4. de Says:

    In my current (real-life) job search, they do keep telling me that a good cover letter will make or break me.

    Hope you get the job 🙂

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